Just some thoughts/reactions to my first few days of #ExperiLent. Feel free to comment!
Thursday I decided to focus on praying for Guatemala and limiting my foods to their basic staples. Dinner on Thursday was pretty tasty - chicken, rice, white cheese, and corn rolled into a tortilla! For breakfast the following day I had huevos rancheros modified. Who knew beans and eggs would taste good together?! Lunch on Friday, while my coworkers ordered pizza, was the same as dinner. The food was enjoyable but I must admit I felt deprived while my coworkers feasted. I came to several realizations over the past two days. I think part of the problem is that I feast all the time (as many in our society do), and since I am constantly feasting, I neglect the benefits of fasting: growing closer to God, self-control, and enjoying what I feast on. I feast so much that I don't notice it - until I do something radical like limiting my food for 40 days!!
My students think I'm eating Chipotle all the time, which I find funny. Anytime there's beans and rice, it must be Chipotle! (that's a blogpost in and of itself about their lack of cultural education). I noticed that their curiosity and the excitement others showed about the simple diet allowed me an opportunity to speak about my faith and why I am sacrificing in this way during Lent. It felt good to be encouraged by others on the journey.
I am growing in awareness that I have to stop giving in to my desires and wants all the time. Although I enjoyed my food this week, I found myself wanting other foods that I have (juice, apples, snacks, frozen pizza, carry-out) as well as the food of others. I remind myself daily that it is good to deny myself. I have become aware of my entitled thinking - if I can get it then I should have it. While talking to a friend today, I found myself wanting her breakfast instead of mine, even though it's not anything I would normally eat. I wanted it because it was something I knew I couldn't have. Why is it that we always want something out of our reach - even when we wouldn't want it if we had it? Above all, I've learned that I have to stop making it all about me and my wants. Which is SO hard at times! But must be done.
That said, tomorrow is my feast day - and I look forward to the occasion. Instead of being entitled, I will approach the feast with gratitude and thanks for what I have been given. And I will thoroughly enjoy!
"Nothing is so inconsistent with the life of a Christian as overindulgence." - Saint Benedict
Luke 21:34 Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down with carousing, drunkenness and the anxieties of life...
Stacy - I didn't know you celebrated lent this year. I've just started a diet myself, and I think you just inspired me to add in the spiritual aspect of self-denial to make it more meaningful than just trying to lose weight. You are pretty amazing if I haven't told you lately :)
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